Sunday, 6 November 2016

Ataxia vs Social Life


I pick social life every time and that's never gonna change. 

I am aware that the following blog entry has a rather fractured nature but I have not edited that as I feel it provides a literal example of my thought patterns when combatting the tiredness that living with ataxia brings. Ataxia does not affect mental capacity and it is often the case that I want to do more but my body either can’t or won’t do what it’s told.  Some days it’s only willpower that gets me through.  Use the force!!

If anyone follows my blog (:-D), you might’ve noticed that I did not publish an entry last week and there is a very simple reason for this = I didn’t write one!!

I didn’t write one due to a sudden and severe attack of Inertia.
Inertia is defined as the resistance of any physical object to any change in its state of motion; this includes changes to its speed, direction or state of rest. It is the tendency of objects to keep moving in a straight line at constant velocity. The principle of inertia is one of the fundamental principles of classical physics that are used to describe the motion of objects and how they are affected by applied forces. Inertia comes from the Latin word, iners, meaning idle (shut up), sluggish.

In mathematical terms Inertia is:
Physical object + Change = Resistance

In relation to me:
Myself + Life = Tiredness

Simply put I did not write a blog entry last week as I was so tired I didn’t want to move for two days! 
In fact, having just reread the bizarre rambling nature that is the beginning of this entry I think I might still be affected! (Oh no!  Are all my blog entries this bad? Perhaps that’s why I have no google followers!!).

(If my neighbours don’t turn down their music, I might be forced to do something I later regret!! Seriously every day at 11.30am??!! -insert copious expletives here-)

 Okay well I suppose you could argue that me being particularly tired this week is in fact, entirely my own fault.  And you would be right because it is!  (although my short temper is currently caused by the pounding music from next door.  They suck.).

Some people (mentioning no names!) might feel that the obsessive planning and strict routines I employ daily are just because I am in a rut that my ataxia prevents me from climbing out of.

1.     Correct but as mentioned in a previous blog entry, my rut is a nice, happy place that I like being in and

2.     My routines are a necessary health protection technique.

My self-created rules, such as NOT planning more than one social activity per day, are designed for me to limit my energy expenditure and therefore reduce my needed recovery time following each period of activity in order for me to move on to the next and maintain a good quality of life.

(I define social activity as shopping, visiting/spending time with people, going out and driving etc.).

Last week I broke my own rules and spent four consecutive days going out, spending time with friends, family, pursuing my own ideas and necessary duties.  I did suffer for this decision, but I'd do it all again and will hopefully do similar rule breaking again in the future!

*A short message for anyone involved in these activities.  I had a great time and even though I needed a longer recovery period, I wouldn’t change a thing and would do it again in a heartbeat.  At this stage of my Ataxia everything tires me out but the memories we create and the times spent with loved ones is needed and always worth it.
 
In conclusion, my life is tiring and frustrating (and full of medication!) for me and (probably more often than I’d like) I am bad tempered because of it.

I am genuinely sorry to any victims of my moods.
Don’t give up on me, I am a good person...although if you do you weren’t worth my efforts anyway, so jog on.

(Glenn and Abraham are dead :-( )
(Negan, Ramsey Bolton and Theodore Bagwell are the three greatest bad guys ever created.)
(Matt Terry is gonna win the X Factor.)

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